Tuesday, 17 December 2013

Kot a

fought his way over to her with a feeling of foreboding Professor McGonagall had a way of

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Review The Full Revelation Here

Thursday, 8 April 2010

LIVERPOOL EATING PART 1 - Romios 20 Lark Lane, Aigburth, L17 8US‏

This greek restaurant is highly unpleasant and I wish it on nobody. When I go to a greek restaurant and ask for pitta bread what do you think I get? Well this time your wrong because they like to serve big shitty burger buns. The lamp kebab tasted like lighter blocks and the chicken had no flavor what so ever. The wine was vinegar and the Stuffed Vine leaves and this is not a joke tasted like sick,We had more but there's no need to go on. Oh and it weren't cheap either.

This greek restaurant is highly unpleasant and I wish it on nobody. When I go to a greek restaurant and ask for pitta bread what do you think I get? Well this time your wrong because they like to serve big shitty burger buns. The lamp kebab tasted like lighter blocks and the chicken had no flavor what so ever. The wine was vinegar and the Stuffed Vine leaves and this is not a joke tasted like sick,We had more but there's no need to go on. Oh and it weren't cheap either.

Thursday, 25 March 2010

Mario's Cafe in Warren Street, London, does a big breakfast for £10.

Eat it all in 20 mins with no drink to wash it down with and you get it free. 
It's 10 eggs, 10 bacon, 10 sausage, 10 toast, 5 black puddings, tomatoes, beans and mushrooms. No Chips !!! 

                                                            Before                                                                           20 Minutes later 

The breakfast packs in 5,000 calories - nearly twice the recommended daily intake for an average man. 
A spokesman for the British Heart Foundation said: "Eating this amount in one sitting is not a good idea."
 Miles Maynard

Wednesday, 24 February 2010

LEFTOVERS: Scandinavian Kitchen, 61 Great Titchfield Street, W1W 7PP

This place is great for a quick light take-out or a speedy sit down. If I'm in the area I pick up selection they do of 5 open-face sandwiches for £7 to share with Mrs. Rajesh for a light dinner alternative.

They also stock pantry/grocery items for home-sick Scandinavian people, you can pick up some Kvikk-Lunsj chocolate (which I dig) or some Caviar Spread that they eat on eggs for breakfast in Norway and Sweden. Fish egg on egg action, don't you love it?

Excellent little Scando sandwiches, and healthy tasting too. My favourites are the meatball and beetroot salad ones as well as the prawn and egg. I started going there when they were fairly new but they've developed a bit of a following so it can get busy during lunch hours and resemble a fishmarket.


5 Sandwiches for £7.00



LEFTOVERS - Frozen Food Review: Unagi

I love eel, especially cooked the japanese way in that rich sweet barbeque sauce. A slab of unagi on rice is absolute heaven for me. I managed to buy some of the unagi sauce froma a Japanese supermarket and then proceeded to hit various fishmongers to score some fresh eel. Most of them, like my local one L. Mash & Sons in Brixton wouldn't stock it, "Too expensive!" they all cried. The estimated prices they were coming up with were extortionate.

Funny because I'd always thought that in London atleast, jellied eel was common place in the old days because it was cheap to acquire? I guess things have changed. Either way, I needed some eel so I hit the supermarket at Japan Centre to investigate the frozen variety, which can be grilled or baked.

This stuff is surprisingly good for frozen food, and tastes very close what you'd get in a small Japanese joint here. I'm convinced that some places do infact use frozen or premaid unagi, I can't think of where but I was once at a sushi place and caught a glimpse of a suspect look package from which the unagi was retrieved.

Bottom line, it's excellent value for money if you want a quick no-fuss Japanese fix at home, serve on some warm japanese rice with some pickles and enjoy.

£6.99 @ JAPAN CENTRE, 212 Piccadilly, London W1J 9HG
(You can get it in most Japanese supermarkets)

Getting Fatter,

LEFTOVERS: M. Manze Pie & Mash House, 105 High Street, Peckham SE15 5RS

Me and my equally brown skinned Cypriot friend known as 'The Moufflon" walked into this place to be greeted by stares, we definitely felt far away from home. They must've laughed at us, two novelty foreignors coming in for some British blue collar gastro tourism.

There's not many of these old fashioned Eel & Pie joints left in London, there's a few east, a few west and some down this way. Surprisingly Manze owns three locations. I've been dieing to try this stuff for ages, and when finally served up this opportunity I found it to be bland, very bland.

The pie pastry was nice enough but the whole plate needed a heavy lashing of salt and vinegar to get some sort of flavour out of it. The filling itslelf was minimal on meat volume. The liquor was flavourless and weak, I'd like to say it was 'subtle', but it was just weak.

I'd still give it another go though, because it's simplicity was kind of comforting.

Yours in Fatness


LEFTOVERS: Maria's Market Cafe, Borough Market SE1

So sometime towards the end of the summer I was hanging out with Doc Simon, we were picking up a rental car to head out to the country side for some secret business. To my pleasure the car was located in Borough so we decided to stop by for some breakfast before we hit the road.

I've been frequenting Borough for as long as I've been in London and I love the place, recently there's been talk of closure or partial closure due to some train line which is sad. Already, part of the market has been downsized and I'm not sure what the plans are for it's future, but I will investigate.

I've passed Maria's for years and but for some reason never went in for anything, I was usually too busy trawling the market to score some rabbit meat amongst other things. I recall it being the only thing open when Doc and I rolled up and were greeted by the very bubbly Maria. She informed us that her family has run this place for a million years and it was originally around the corner in a brick and mortar location. She told us a famous actor ripped off one of their recipes when he opened a restaurant a back in the day, and James Mcavoy apparantly steps in for the Bacon, Bubble & Cheese Bap which is somewhat of a cult classic.

And damn was she right! This sandwich is perfect, I know it's a simple little concoction but I'm convinced that there's some secret alchemy at play in the bubble and whatever she seasons it with. I smothered the little cheesey, salty bap of joy with brown sauce and surrendered to it's beauty.

Humble, honest and comforting, this sandwich is your friend.

Bacon, Bubble & Cheese @ £3.70 - Maria's Market Cafe.

Yours in Fatness,

Footnote: I was so shell shocked with how good the sandwich was that when we returned to Borough to drop off the car off later in the day I raced like a Crack-Head past all the venison burgers, chorizo sandwiches, tourists and rabbit merchants until I reached Maria's again and literally inhaled the sandwich.


Wow, I've been away for way too long and Melvin's been nagging me to get my gastronomic shit together.

So, to bring my posting up to date I'll be putting up what I'm calling 'Leftovers' which are all the posts that have been collecting dust on my harddrive during my sabbatical. Lots of good stuff to come...

Stay Tuned & Stay Fat



Friday, 22 January 2010

Thursday, 29 October 2009

Mangal Ocakbasi aka Mangal 1

This intimate Turkish spot tucked away on Dalston's Arcola Street (home of the legendary Arcola Theater) can be utilised as a takeaway vendor or eat in venue, and I'm sure that either would be equally enjoyed by those partaking.

On this evening we were eating inside, although a slight breeze from the open door could have suggested otherwise after a few minutes it was more than counter acted by the roaring open charcoal grill. This grill is manned in a serious manner by various members of staff and is the area from where the succulent lamb and chicken emerges.

The beer on offer is limited to Turkish brand Effes, but this beer is fine and sometimes I think that too much choice can be a bad thing (especially when it come to intoxicants).

The menu comprises of traditional Turkish dishes, this means plenty of meat, but if you are vegetarian you would not be left out in the cold. We started with a basket of  thick slices of warm, soft bread accompanied by some extremely well made Tzatziki and and a dish of chopped fried aubergine in garlic and herbs which I recommend highly. Our waiter also brought over some hummus in place of the lahmajun that we ordered (people call this Turkish pizza to contextualise it in a western kebab shop setting, but it is not really a pizza) I think they did us a favor here though as we really didn't need a portion of  doughy lahmajun on top of what was to Follow.

The main course, on one side very tender well marinated lamb, cooked over the charcoal to perfection and plated up with a huge salad, chunk of lemon and grilled tomato and chili. On the other, lamb of similar delicacy but sliced and presented in a pot with strained yoghurt's a spicy tomatoe salsa and the same grilled vegetables, again a huge fresh salad but this time on a separate plate. Both very delicious, the only fault being the bread cubes placed in the yoghurt, but overall an extremely professional and satisfying display of Turkish cuisine.

The service is fine, maybe a little hurried, but not rude. And the price, very reasonable (even though I forgot my card for the third time since buying an new over-sized wallet and so could not pay) a meal for two with beer will set you back about £25

All over I would give this place 4 out of 5 or 8 out of 10 depending on which system you would prefer to use. But well worth a visit and especially after a trip to the fine theater across the street...

10 Arcola Street, Dalston, E8 2DJ
Tel: 020 7275 8981
Travel: Dalston Kingsland rail/67, 76, 149, 243 bus
Times: Meals served noon-midnight daily

By Lomaxo 

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Tuesday, 29 September 2009


(Strictly no photos were aloud, so all photographs were secretly taken on mobile phones).

As I sat in the steam room in the Four Seasons Hotel with a glass of cucumber water in my hand, pampering myself before the 81st Academy Awards, I  wondered. What gastronomic delights awaited me?

I was in LA for the first time . A celebrity friend of mine, who I shall leave unnamed, invited me to the biggest showbiz bash on the planet, The Oscars!

On arrival there are police and helicopters circling the Kodak theatre. Crowds of people swarm the streets like hungry animals wanting a bite from the perfect celebrity cuisines . People with homophobic and self promoting placards line up wanting to be seen. Me, I was just hungry and wanted this hell soup to end, so I could get to the main course, The Governors Ball. This is the big dinner after the show. So in we go, like cattle down the blood red carpet, lights blinding you every witch way you go, and oh look there's Danny Glover, is he hungry? When you eventually make it in your surrounded by the hollywood elite, Sean Penn walks past with his crew. Sarah Jessica Parker is being followed by a hired hand so no one steps on her dress. But he's always there holding it off the ground, so in effect he is part of the dress. Good look!

And so it begins The Oscars. The big show. It's all so golden and duty free smelling.

Hugh Jackman appears on stage and proceeds to go ape shit for the next five minutes. This is his opening. Throughout the evening if you get up to go out during the commercial break, and you miss the countdown to get back to the show, they lock all the doors until the next break, and a seat filler will sit in your seat so the show doesn't look dead. This is an out of work panic stricken actor.

I went out to get a glass of water, queued for 20 minutes, only to discover it wasn't a free bar, and damn I had no cash on me. So i'm sure for the first time in Oscar history, I used the public water fountain. People looked at me like I was shitting into a bucket, and shouting "Run Forest Run!' at the top of my voice. I got back to my seat and the show wizzed along. I dribbled, I laughed, I even cried a bit. It was good, bad and a little ugly .

Stage 2 of the mission. The Governors Ball.

We sit down at a very tacky looking table. There's a band playing dinner jazz, free CD style. Kevin Kline and the girl from The Gremlins are sat at the end of the table. One guy complains to himself about the food because he's on a no carb diet. The waiter comes over with an appetizer. A pizza dough with smoke salmon and caviar on top. Not the greatest combination, but the fish eggs and salmon where fine. And if it's good enough for the Gov, it's good enough for me. Whoever he is?!. Then some soup, and some not so good rice with meat was served. So unimpressed by this, I didn't take a photo. Thinking this was the only food going, and knowing that the Vanity Fair party was around the corner, and remembering how drunk I liked to get, down it went.

For desert, a cube of chocolate arrived with a removable lid, and an edible Oscar on top with chocolates inside. I bit the head off the oscar thinking it would be the finest co co in town, but to my surprise it took me right back to the little football chocolates I would get for Crimbo. You know the ones, that tasted like crayon. So, quite full and slightly board, we went for a stroll around the ball. " What is this?" I yelled. "Why did no one mention this?"  We'd found a room full of lavish wonders. There were Oscar cookies, a chocolate fountain with strawberries, chocolate moose, a mountain of shell fish, and two mini hills of sushi. Actually not the most lavish. But after the weird rice and chocolate box combo I'd just had, this was lavish . The cookies were good, the fountain had an interesting flow, especially with the fresh strawberries. The sushi wasn't that good, a bit dry and lonely.

Stage 3 the Vanity Fair party. Now this was a proper celebrity squeeze. Within the space of a five minutes Mickey Rourke left the building, I saw Elton John sulking in the corner, and Ben Stiller was making big joke all over the floor. But lets cut the celebrity chit chat, and get to the food.

Since America and the Worlds economic crisis the good people at Vanity Fair cut down on the freebies. So no pyramid of Ipods, no taps of Channel No 5 running, and certainly no gourmet food.  As I was hob knobbing and making no sense at all, I see a girl sheepishly appear from the crowd holding a soggy box of In and Out burgers. "I'll have one of those please",  "yes sir". The In and Out girls were having the best time, meeting all the celebs and handing out cold burgers with the biggest smiles on their faces. I took a bite and on looking back it has occurred to me, that that burger summed up the hole evening. It looked good but was cold and tasteless and it always looks better in the movies

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6 Therberton Street 

Islington, London

N1 0QX

020 7226 0504


We stumbled upon this curry house walking up Upper St from Angel in the hope of finding an Indian. We first walked past the chain Masala Zone, which I've eaten in before and didn't enjoy. Parveen is very near the cool, old cinema – Screen on the Green.


The Decor was pleasant, low-lit and, in the area we were in, the music was quiet.  However, we were sat right by the door, which was open, causing us to be sat in a draught. The seat wasn't overly comfortable – a standard wooden chair. 


The service was prompt, despite the fact that our waitresses English was pretty poor. After poppadoms, which were good, we were kept waiting for some time for our food – perhaps as long as forty minutes. The food then came sans rice and we had to wait a couple of minutes for the rice to arrive, which was tortuous after waiting for the dishes to arrive.


I ordered a Basil Fawlty (Balti) with chicken, garlic naan and Pilau rice. I enjoyed my meal and the meat was of good quality – not overly hot and stated as being med/hot. We were given hot towels after our meal. But no palette cleanser or mints etc. (Apologies for the poor pic, didn't have my camera – it was better than it looks!)


Pretty standard pricing really – around seven to nine pounds for a main. We were presented with 20% of our bill at the end, in a brick Lane style 'everyone gets a discount'. It was still appreciated though.


The restroom felt a little neglected and a doorway had been left open to view old cans of oil outside. One tap was broken, but it was clean.


Friendly staff, tasty food. A few little things could have been better. Like cloth napkins instead of paper and an ice bucket for the wine. The wait for the meal was also slightly too lengthy. If I was in the area again, I would quite likely go back – although the Spanish Tapas bar just up the road may get my custom next time.

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Eastern Eye

120 Queen St

Newton Abbot, TQ12 2EU, United Kingdom

+44 1626 331155

I'd been to this curry house a couple of times a few years ago and when going back this time found it to have become three times the size it was. This expansion represents how popular this restaurant has become. If you're going on a Saturday, expect it to be very busy and it's essential to book a table.


The Decor feels quite up-market, with large, heavy leather chairs, placed around nicely laid tables, with heavy white table cloths and napkins.


Service was prompt and we had poppadoms and beers to start with – cobra and kingfisher on tap. I ordered the chicken Bhuna, Pilau rice, onion Bhajis and a peshwari naan.


As the starter plates were collected my dad commented on how little mess he'd made in comparison with the rest of us – to which our waiter responded "the more mess you make, the more we think you're enjoying your meal". The waiter was very friendly and attentive and you could have a joke with him.

There were six of us and the food came in good time and all together. Each dish had it's on bowl with a nightlight in it, which is always a nice touch. Good weight (hot) plates and cutlery add a quality feel. We were also presented with a free dish of chicken tandoori to share.

The food is really excellent – medium hotness and perfectly cooked chicken. Everyone in my party was satsfied – with the exception of Kate, saying that she preferred the dish at the Chandi curry house in Berlin.

I couldn't possibly manage a desert as I was so full. We were then presented with hot towels and slices of orange to cleanse the palette. We were then given a round of complimentary shots of Sambucca (with a coffee bean floating in it) and Baileys. The waiter did a neat trick and blew out the flames with a click of the thumb. They came back several times offering more shots for free.

If that gets you warmed up for a night out, I recommend the Jolly Farmer pub in the centre of town – they've got a good selection of ales, table football and an outside area with picnic benches.

This is truly a great curry house, with many awards under their belt, that I like to return to everyone time I'm i the area.

4.2/5 (had to drop it a bit because Kate wasn't wholly satisfied with her Chicken Dupiaza)

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Address: Immanuelkirchstr. 32, 10405 Berlin

Phone: +49 30 440 62 38

Type: Indian

This curry house is just across the road from The Loft hostel, in the Friedrichshain district of Berlin, where my girlfriend and I were staying. It was a warm evening so we sat outside on long picnic-style benches, although the decor inside was perfectly pleasant.

We started with some poppodoms and sauces which came very quickly. The poppodoms had crushed peppers and chilis in them making them the hottest ones I have ever had – the ice cold beer helped to quench this though.

The general atmosphere was good, with several other local (or at least German) couples sat around us enjoying a meal.

I ordered a chicken Rogan Josh, Pilau rice and a garlic naan – Kate had the same. The dishes came already served out onto a plate, rather than in separate dishes – I tend to prefer the latter. However, it was nicely presented and came with a small side-salad garnish, which helped to further quell the heat from the poppadoms. The dish had a very light, clean feel, it wasn't a heavy sauce as one becomes accustomed to in England. It was medium hot. I didn't feel overly full from the meal either. 

There was just one woman working away in the kitchen, the food felt freshly prepared and the meat was tender.

The service was good and our waiter friendly – we started attempting to speak German to our waiter and we quickly established it would be easier for all of us to say everything in English.

We hung around and had another beer afterwards and felt no pressure to leave.

Overall, I enjoyed the meal, it was was of good quality but not outstanding. The lack of hot towels at the end was a disappointment.

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